Friday, May 17, 2013

The Limerick

I think if I start conversations with "There once was a man from Nantucket..." there will be a man one day who will respond with 4 additional lines in an AABBA rhyming pattern.  He will either be my soul mate or padded cell mate.

Sometimes I talk too much.  I just have alot to say and in no specific order.

I wish I was more a combination of Gloria Steinem and the hot slutty blonde on Desperate Housewives than a combination of Dr. Seuss and the guy on The Wiggles who always falls asleep. 

There has only been one man who could follow my conversations.  Even when I was on Starbucks.  And Vodka.  I miss him.  People tend to cut me off when I get too wordy or A.D.D.-y.  Some even tell me to "get to point."  Like my ex husband.  He had only a seven word limit before every thing I said sounded like Charlie Brown's teacher to him.  I could up it to about eighteen words if I spoke with my top off.  My teenagers have about a seven word limit too.  I could up it to about eighteen words if I start my sentence with "Here's $20..."  My seven year old thinks I'm interesting and hilarious.  Sadly, I know it's just another awkward phase. I really can't complain.  I have great friends and family. They are very patient souls who will listen to me for hours no matter what I say. 

...and everyone else can just suck it.



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